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All my life, I have been in four serious interviews. And that does not include the VERY serious one of getting a life partner which I am yet to pass. In these interviews, you are dismissed for eating a piece of pizza folder instead of flat. She would later text her friend and say, “that guy is a loser, who folds his pizza at this day and age?” And with that. You are dismissed. Well, I have been successful in two interviews, and very unsuccessful in the other two. Life has a way of balancing itself out, eeh?

One set me on a trajectory that seemed to define my life. It was a first love kinda thing. It taught me I can, I am good enough, and I just need to believe that I can. I volunteered for eight months without pay. I grew in ways I could have never imagined.

One December, I was given a check of 20k. Imagine that! I wanted to buy Waumini radio. Ok, I don’t know why I said that. I was a rich boy. At 19, I didn’t know what I could do with 20k. I gave my mum 10 k, you know how sons and mothers are. Besides, she had a small project going on. The rest, I bought a Chinese blackberry. It had that shiny aluminum frame, a pitch blackface and wait for it……...a QWERTY (this is the easiest word to type on the key board) keyboard, back in in 2008. It looked beautiful in a cheap way. Needless to say it didn’t last longer than six months. My 7k went down the drain. I still have it to remind me of some bad choices I have made along the way.

The second one set me up to a place I would call home for the next six years. It was an answered prayer. I remember telling my then girlfriend (yes haters, I once dated. I loved her and I still think she still loves me.hehe) the kind of a job I wanted. I got exactly what I prayed for. Though nowadays I have many unanswered prayers, I know that God answers.  I had fun, initially. It was exciting. Everyday had its own challenges. I would travel meet many people, mostly older. It feels good when an elder values your opinion. “Wahinya, that was a good decision.”That does something to you, but you answer ‘Ni God.”

The first years were great, but I started outgrowing it. I stayed over for a longer because it had this good feeling attached to it. I was after all helping the people achieve their dreams. Kids especially. The kids loved me and I loved them. Still do. Children are fun- when playing with them and not when changing diapers or staying up all night begging them to sleep so that you can sleep. After six years, I left. Very few people I worked with have ever called to see how I am doing. Lesson: loyalty is overrated.

The third one left me with a scathed ego. They grilled me for one hour fifteen minutes. When I walked out, I was more positive than a child who thinks the world is the best place to be away from the darkness of the womb. When they grow up, they realize that the world is darker: Metaphorically though. In my mind, I had aced the interview and the job was mine to lose. They never called or emailed to say I was unsuccessful. I wrote several emails to ask about the progress, no reply. The lady who had emailed me inviting me for the interview with prompt answers to any question I raised didn’t return any of my emails.

After a few weeks, I gathered enough courage to call. I called and some guy at the front desk answered. It was a Wednesday. When I asked about a role I had applied. He told me that the person reported on Monday. He said it so calmly. That guy’s a heartbreaker. You know them from a distance. Even over the phone you can tell. My heart sunk. I was heartbroken. I had been rejected. To date, I have never gotten over it. After the interview, I had started imagining myself on that green lawn after lunch catching up with the latest news. Or walking through the glass doors with a lanyard on my neck with my name on it felling all accomplished. It never happened.  Just like the beautiful would have but never did love stories.

 

Every time I pass near that office, emotions overwhelm me. Before you accuse me of being sentimental and all. I loved the organization. It was my dream organization. I always wanted to work there. On bad days I wonder what could have become of us. I think we would have been a great match. Match made in upper hill.

The last one was a few weeks ago, well, months. That was a year after my left my job. I was ready and willing to try something new as I still had some time in my hands. The thought of doing something new was riveting. I did my research, I prepared. Heck, I think I over prepared. As I sat in that interview for 45 minutes. Questions were thrown my way. I answered them. I don’t think I fumbled, but I was not convincing. Thing is, while I was seated there, I wasn’t fully convinced that this is what I wanted to do. I had my doubts but I soldiered on. I would fall in love along the way. I guess our actions follow our beliefs, I wasn’t successful. Three days later, I was called with a regret note ’one guy didn’t think you are good enough.” I was rejected. Again.

You see, going through an interview humbles you. You are at the mercy of the interviewers. One guy can decide that they don’t like the colour of your shirt and your goose is cooked. It tells you that no matter how good you think you are; someone else has to decide whether you are as good as you say. It teaches patience. One interviewer wanting you to throw you under the bus asks you a silly question, but because you want the job you dress it up nicely and try to make sense out of it. It’s a skill, though daunting, it has to be done. Next time you re invited for one, don’t wear to impress if you plan to leave your confidence at home. Sometimes that’s all you need. In fact, that’s all you need. Confidence.

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